


love me all the way

by cxyst



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Drabble, M/M, and it's not often im proud of my writing so yayyy :))), i just wrote this in an ask on my tumblr and read it over and really quite liked it, it's quite short but i like the way it's written, ok shut up now lara, so i thought i'd share it here too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-03
Updated: 2013-12-03
Packaged: 2018-01-03 09:51:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1069054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cxyst/pseuds/cxyst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a dumb sad!louis drabble thing</p>
            </blockquote>





	love me all the way

louis’ been feeling horrible all day. he doesn’t know why, but his stomach is all twisted up and his skin is prickling and he has that hot feeling in the back of his throat that means he could cry if he lets go for more than a second. that won’t happen, louis won’t let it happen, but it’s still uncomfortable.

he’s so, so tired. he feels like his mind has been buzzing in circles, ‘need a break need a break need a break’, since he got sick in australia. now he’s finally crashing. and it’s just that he would never normally let it get like this. it’s messing him around, the way he can’t seem to get a grip and just joke the heavy feeling away.

he knows harry knows, too, which is making it that little bit worse. because louis never wants to worry him, hates the little furrow he gets between his eyebrows, the way his pretty mouth turns down at the corners. he doesn’t want harry to feel like he has to watch him or take care of him; pity leaves a fuzzy taste in his mouth, even when it’s coming from harry.

(harry, who is so fucking special that louis can’t breathe, some nights. just to stir awake in the dimness and roll over and look at him, the curves of his face and the softness of his skin, makes him start to think mad things. things like love and fate and forever. like a pair of swallows, and a ship and a compass, and two tiny scrawled words that mean more than anyone could guess.)

and so when they get home, finally, after the flight from japan - leaving mismatched bags skidded across the carpet and shoes in the doorway - when they finally make it to a place where they don’t have to hide, harry stands across from him in the kitchen and watches him make tea with those careful, careful eyes.

'stop it, dick head.'

harry doesn’t flinch. ‘yeah, yeah.’

'shut up,' louis says, louder now. it's his 'leave me alone, i'm about to break and it won't be pretty' voice, but harry still won't react, won't back off.

he steps closer instead, calm and unafraid, and says, ‘c’mere.’

louis wants to grin and crack a joke but his hands are shaking. he fumbles a mug and it makes a cracking sound against the bench, making him jump. his (harry’s) jumper slips off his collarbone a little as he lets his shoulders slump.

'mm,' he says. and that's all, because he knows that he doesn't need real words for harry to know that he means 'please hold me'.

harry smells like airport and that stupid sports deodorant of liam’s that he borrowed on the plane, but underneath that there’s just harry. louis buries his face into his chest, sighing out a shaky little breath.

'just tired, probably, i don't know,' he murmurs nonsensically. 'feel like shit.'

harry smooths his hands up and down louis’ back, hitching up the jumper to feel warm skin. ‘it’s a lot, babe, i know,’ he says, quietly like he’s trying not to startle.

louis squeezes his eyes shut and clenches his little fists in harry’s shirt. his ribcage rattles in and out but he will not cry.

'wanna go upstairs?' harry murmurs. 'could fuck you, if you want?'

louis nods quickly. ‘yeah, yeah, please.’

it’s easy to latch on to something as automatic as sex, when he feels like he’s been cut loose from his tether, like he’s spinning out.

he half-stumbles up the stairs - vision hazy, feeling too hot, too cold - but harry puts a strong hand on his waist, keeping him steady.

(and that’s how it is tonight, isn’t it? harry warm and solid and there, always.)

harry hugs him once more next to the bed, long and gentle, nuzzling down to suck a little mark behind his ear that hair and makeup will hide easily. goose bumps settle over louis’ skin as he concentrates on the feeling, the heat and dull throb of harry’s tongue and teeth.

harry pulls back and presses a thumb into the pink mark as he kisses louis on the mouth. he sucks at his bottom lip softly, barely there. lifts the big jumper up louis’ back with his huge hands and coaxes it off.

it all feels so careful, and normally louis would hate that, but it’s stopping his hands from shaking so he just lets himself be kissed and held.

and when harry lays him out on the bed and fucks him loose on his fingers, mouthing up the underside of his cock, then pushes in slow, rocking in deep and gentle until louis is comes apart, clenching around him, it’s- louis feels like he’s being brought back down to earth and sucked away from it at the same time.

harry never lets go of his hand.


End file.
